Young Victoria

Bright Star

Only you

I loved this song from the moment I heard it during the credits of the movie Young Victoria. That movie was so touching and so amazingly beautiful. The story line is amazing. I will have to get it out again when we go to the video store next. Emily blunt did an extraordinary job as Queen Victoria, as did Rupert Friend as Prince Albert. I really feel like watching it now! Another movie which I enjoyed very very much was Bright Star, also a beautiful film. Both of them are very touching, but so sad at the same time.

Better days

Caleb left today, been feeling kind of empty since. I feel with every time I see him we grow within our relationship a bit more. Even though I think we are very strongly grounded already and know a lot about one another, but slowly finding out little things about each other, that we may not have known before. Things we couldn't have known when we hadn't met each other yet. Like the spots which are most ticklish, the kind of kiss or hug they favor most. I feel so comfortable with him now and that feels really nice :) to feel like there is nothing you need to worry about because it doesn't matter.

I've always felt content and loved so much, cared for and wanted. The way I think love should feel, he's there for me when I'm feeling down and he always supports me. I feel so amazingly lucky to have him. The distance doesn't seem so much of a big deal to me anymore, because I have come to accept it. I would never give him up for anything. Distance could never change how much I love him, nothing could. We've endured the tests of time along with many others, and its all only brought us closer together. I know whatever the future holds; we'll be able to overcome it. We were young when we met and still are, but who says young love can't last? Because I believe it can, age does not determine your capability to love someone unconditionally.

White roses

Painting by: Henry Meynell Rheam - Sleeping Beauty

His painting are so beautiful!!

I wish you would listen to what I am trying to tell you.

Shoobidy-doo

There is a beer in the fridge. Now I'm not usually a fan of beer, or any other alcohol for that matter. I don't mind a glass of wine every now and then (if it is one of the rare ones I actually like that is) haha! Mum says most wine is quite an acquired taste, that I may not get until I am older. And cocktails can be nice too. I have never been drunk though, and I don't really plan on it. It's not that I think drinking is bad, not close. I think there is nothing wrong with it and if people enjoy getting drunk then who's to judge? I just hope they are being safe of coarse :) haha! But I just have never personally felt like I wanted to get drunk, I have fun being sober and I prefer it that way. And I like being in control of what I am doing. Anyways! That damn beer in the fridge, it's like it's talking to me "Drink me please! I've been sitting here for way to long!" But why do I feel like drinking it when I don't even really like the taste? Although we do have this stuff which you can add to beer to make it taste like ginger beer, but then that completely ruins the purpose of drinking beer. May as well just go out and buy some ginger beer, which really I would prefer. But unfortunately we do not have any ginger beer at the moment and damn now I really feel like it!

Moments of pleasure

Thankful

Did my exam yesterday! I think I did alright, waiting for the results to be posted. I was so tired when I sat the exam though, I had hardly any sleep the night before since I was stressing about the exam. But that night I had a bath, played music (Kate Bush! Music from her "The Red Shoes" Album, which is superb! Very relaxing, it's like it just takes you to another place), lit some candles, and I can not express my love for candles enough! Also lit a Musk incense stick, which smelt so good. Was pure bliss, honestly. So relaxing :) I think I need to do that more often! But I just wish our bath was different to the one we have since ours isn't very big. I have always dreamed of having one of those baths which aren't attached to the wall and are really really deep. I am definitely going to be getting one of those when I get my own house :). This week has been so full on, but at the same time fulfilling for me. I'm really happy with where I am now, and that feels good. I can't wait until I can finally sleep in tomorrow morning and just lay in bed as long as I want knowing there are no responsibilities I must deal with that day. I haven't been able to sleep in once this week! Thank goodness for weekends is all I have to say :P

Inspiration

I don't know why this is, but unless I am feeling some sort of emotion I find it difficult to write (creative writing). I really enjoy writing poems, but it is rare that I can just whip one out without having to feel something emotionally first. The only poem I have ever been able to do that with is "Open your eyes." I literally wrote it in 5 minuets, but I haven't been able to do that with any other. I need time to think about it first, to have some kind of emotion feeding my thoughts. Usually to get myself into this zone, I listen to music.

Exam on Thursday, which I have been practically studying all day for -sigh. But it's 11:20pm now, so I should probably stop and go for a shower and get some sleep so I am able to constructively study again tomorrow. Then once the exam is over I need to focus on the assignment. But I do feel in a good place at the moment as far as university goes so that is a positive.

At least the exam is all multiple-choice ;)

Psychology

The more I get into my psychology coarse, the more I know I made the right decision for what I want to do for a career. I just love learning everything we have been, its so interesting. To the point, I want to pick up that text book and read the whole chapter on Positive Psychology. Things like that usually aren't normal for me haha! I have just been taking steps forward recently and damn does it feel good! Caleb is coming on the 18th, so excited! He'll be here for the Easter holidays. I can't wait to see him again, it'll just make everything even better.

I still need to get a job though, thats the only thing that's not so good at the moment. But I will definitely start applying at places soon! I need the money.

On a random note, had citrus tea from T2 with Claire today and it is sooooo good! Shall have to get me some of that next time I'm there :)

Embrace

1 Corinthians 10:13

No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down. He'll never let you be pushed past your limit. He'll always be there to help you through it.

peppermint tea

Don't you hate it when there is something bothering you and you just wish you could forget about it and for it all to just vanish from your mind. But no matter how hard you try to not think about it, it always finds a way to creep back in.

Many chances

I really feel as though there have been times when things don't work out and I get bummed about it. But when I really think about it, not everything is going to work out the way you imagined it (especially the first time). And we need to give ourselves room to make mistakes because they are in some ways important, because we learn from them and know how to better deal with situations the next time we are faced with them. Just don't give up and keep going with it, even if you fail the first time you can try again. It doesn't matter how long it takes for you to achieve it, since you'll be learning as you go. And it'll make achieving it even more fulfilling :)

How you made them feel.

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
—Maya Angelou

Appreciation Diary

So I feel like I'm on the right track now, was a bit of confusion a while back. Just with uni, but I have it all sorted out now and gosh does it feel good! I've also figured out I worry, way to much. I just am sick of it to be honest, because as we all would know... it really doesn't feel good. And the things I worry about are things I shouldn't even worry about. Because quite frankly I have no control over them, so whats the point? We were talking about that at my uni lecture the other day, how people worry over things they have no control over and how it affects their happiness. Because having a positive outlook on things, contributes hugely to your happiness studies have shown. And apparently positive people live 10 years longer, because our emotions are linked to our body's, just like stress and how they say the more stressed you are the higher the risks of certain health complications arising. It kind of all sounds pretty scary haha! But really there are lots of things that contribute to your health. And it's easy to be positive :) you just need to change your outlook on things. Of coarse everyone will endure sadness in their lives, no one can be constantly happy it's not possible. But also just things like creating an appreciation diary can help a lot with your outlook on things and help increase happiness. Just with helping to make us realise all the things in our lives which we appreciate and make us happy. Helping other people instead of doing things for selfish reasons has also shown as quite the happiness riser. I have been finding all these things extremely interesting!

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection"
-Buddah

So today I was thinking about body image and self confidence. I know everyone at some stage in their life has been self conscious. One thing I think is so horrible, is that girls and guys these days are becoming self conscious younger and younger and that's scary. I remember when I was little, my biggest worry was whether it was going to rain today and I wouldn't get to play outside. And when you think about all the media and the portrayal of what is "beautiful" there is really no wonder why. I have decided I just want to not read fashion magazines anymore, just because they portray an unrealistic idea of what beauty is and practically try to con you into buying something you don't really need, by trying to find your insecurities and try to convince you this product is your answer. When most of the time you buy it and turn out extremely disappointed. And it's like if your not like size 6, you just don't cut it apparently? Well what bull-poop if you ask me. I know girls who are of all different sizes and their all gorgeous. Yeah, girls in magazines probably all have perfect legs, no cellulite, and amazing clear skin. Although, a lot of the time they are photo-shopped. But in reality all you need to do is look around you to see the variety of people there are. We're all unique, we each have different features, body shapes, hair colours, etc.

I think acceptance is the key, and not comparing ourselves to everyone else. We should love and look after our bodies, because well its the only one we have.

Be kind to yourself and remember your beautiful :)